Death By A Fortune Cookie
by A.E. Reed
Summary: A fun little game with some fortune cookies that goes wrong. Note: I had this posted up before and I took it down. Now I'm putting it up again.


**So I wanted to make a light, happy, and funny one-shot. I got this idea while eating some Chinese food, well after the food when desert came around. It's a fun little game my uncle has heard of and shared with us.**

**Disclaimer: profile **

"Chinese is here!" Garcia yelled through the bullpen. In minutes her office was full of Chinese food and friends. In the room sat JJ, Hotch, Garcia, Morgan, Ried, Prentiss, and Rossi cramped up into a small space.

"Hotch, can you scoot over?" JJ asked her boss.

"Okay," the team got comfy and dug into their Chinese food. Soon the Chinese food had been cleared out and the team laid back against the wall looking at each other.

"Time for fortune cookies!" Emily Prentiss yelled tossing everyone their own fortune cookie, "Okay, first eat the cookie and then we will share the fortunes okay?"

"Okay," the group said in unison. Quickly, Morgan gobbled down his cookie and said aloud.

"You will gain admiration from your peers." In the corner Prentiss snorted looking up to see Morgan. He just looked at her curiously.

"What happened Prentiss?"

"Oh nothing," she said innocently looking around the room. Everyone stared at her and finally Garcia spoke up.

"Hun, you can't laugh like that and then just tell us that it was nothing. We all know you thought of something funny, so spill."

"Yeah, Em," JJ piped in.

"Okay, well, see there's this game you play when you open your fortune cookie. You read your fortune and then add 'in bed' at the end. It makes it real funny," she said looking around the room again and finally stopping at Garcia.

"So now my fortune says, you will gain admiration from your peers in bed?" Morgan asked.

"Yep," Prentiss confirmed.

"It's true!" Garcia joked winking at him.

"Okay, me next!" JJ said excitedly she looked down at her fortune and read aloud," Never forget a friend. Especially if he owes you… in bed!" Giggles erupted from the women in the tiny office.

"Wow, JJ that's some piece of advice!" Morgan told her finishing the sentence with a fit of laughter. Hotch and Rossi sat beside each other with small smiles on their face. Reid, in the other corner of the room, had a scared look on his face

"Okay Reid, your up!" Garcia cheered "You've been so quiet so you must have something good!"

"How is it good th-"

"Just read it, Pretty Boy," Morgan told him.

"Okay, good things are being said about you… in bed?"

"Wow, who's being saying those good things about you?" JJ asked. Prentiss, Garcia, JJ, and Morgan began laughing once again. "Garcia your next!"

"Bite me. In bed!"

"That's some kinky cookie Baby girl," Morgan looked up at her trying to hold in a laugh. Garcia met his eyes and smirked. The Chinese food and the wrappers from the cookies were littered around them.

"Uh, Hotch then Rossi and at the end Prentiss. That okay with you guys?" JJ questioned looking around. Everyone nodded in agreement ready to continue the fun game.

"Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded, in bed." He said in a monotone.

"By who?" Garcia asked in disbelief, while chocking down her giggles.

"That's good but I really wanna here what Rossi's is so Rossi if you will do the honors," Morgan told the group looking expectantly at Agent Rossi.

He blew air through his cheeks and held the fortune in front of him, "You will receive an unexpected gift from an elderly relative, in bed. What the hell?"

"Wow Rossi that has got to be the weirdest fortune I think I have ever heard." Morgan said.

"And the one that gives you the worst mental imagine ever," Prentiss said with a shudder, "Anyway, mine says… enhance your karma by engaging in various charitable activities… in bed!"

The group, once again, began laughing but in the middle of it all a knock on the door was heard. JJ moved from her spot of in front of the door and Garcia yelled for the person on the other side to open the door. On the other side there was a very pissed Erin Strauss.

"What is going on in this room?" she demanded looking at each person on the floor her gaze landing on the owner of 'the lair'.

"So?" she pressed with a cold glare.

"We were, uh, having fun with fortune cookies Sir, uh, I mean Ma'm," she said looking up into Strauss's cold glare. She shoved one of the left over cookies into her hand. Angrily, Strauss cracked open the cookie and looked at the paper.

"Wait! You have to eat the cookie first!" JJ jumped in. Strauss returned her remark with a cold glare and read her fortune aloud.

"You will attend a party were strange costumes prevail."

"In bed!" Morgan added. The room burst out with laughter.

"Just go back to work!" Strauss bellowed stalking off.

**Wow I had no other place to end it. This is my first one-shot and it came out way better than I thought it would. Let me know if you hate it, love it, or what? I have never made a CM fiction so sorry if everyone is OOC But I would really like a review even if you're going to flame me. Also if you really liked the game just try it at home it's real fun.**

**P.S. I own none of the fortunes either. I have hunted them all down off Google. :)**


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